Anyway, all of this spirulina, milk and toilet paper helped me get through the six-hour SotC marathon at Chez Koba this weekend. So, let me pour myself a glass of milk and I'll tell you all about the Big Blow. (But enough about Monica Lewinsky - on with the review!)
Storm of the Century was touted to be a Stephen King epic similar to It and The Stand, both of which were successful mini-series. However, it doesn't quite measure up to the standards of those two shows. The story, for those of you caught in a snowbank, was that a mysterious stranger shows up on a small island in Maine just as a huge snowstorm hits. He starts killing people, and manipulating people to kill either themselves or others. His calling card is a cane with a silver wolf's head, some really bad orthodonture, and the phrase, give me what I want and I'll go away. Although the stranger, Andre Linoge, is obviously malevolent, we know very little about him or his motivations.
Debrah Farentino plays Molly Anderson, the wife of Mike Anderson, the town grocer and constable. She's also the mother of four-year-old Ralphie. Molly is a very Devon-like character, with a milder version of the "take-charge attitude" that we've all come to know and love. She's a calming influence on her husband, who tends to see things in black and white.
As the storm blows, and the bodies stack up almost as fast as the snow, the viewer sees the residents of Little Tall Island become more desperate. Linoge knows all of their little secrets, and exposes them. He keeps telling people to give him what he wants, but he refuses to tell them what it is that he wants. As the entire town gathers in the Town Hall, they have a mass dream in which they discover what their fate will be if they refuse. They will commit mass suicide, similar to the Roanoke colonists in 1587. Gee, what a coincidence! Debrah leading a bunch of people that are gonna disappear?? We've seen this before, haven't we?
Finally, Linoge gets around to telling the islanders what he wants. He wants one of their children to train as his protegee. He's not immortal, but he has a very long lifespan, and he's getting old. The townspeople are horrified, and rightly so. However, they realize that they have no choice. The lone dissenter is Mike Anderson. He thinks that they can fight Linoge and win. Molly agrees with the rest of the town. She's willing to sacrifice her son so that the rest of them can live. It's a good thing, too, because you just KNOW who's kid is going to win the Linoge Lottery. Linoge takes Ralphie, Mike blames Molly for the loss of their son, they get a divorce, and Mike moves to San Francisco. Ten years later, he's walking through Chinatown and sees Linoge and Ralphie. He calls out to them, Ralphie turns and snarls at him - he's got the same wolf's teeth as Linoge does.
Storm was touted as this grand battle between good and evil - a subject that King did better in The Stand. However, it wound up being more about situational ethics, the secrets that we keep, and the good of the many outweighing the good of the few. The movie builds to a climax, then does a face-forward snow angel into a drift. Instead of a thrilling climax, or heroics by either Mike or Molly, we get a very talky, boring, and predictable finish with very little resolution. It may be true in life, but it's bad storytelling. The direction also made it difficult to suspend one's beliefs long enough to watch the show. For example - residents of an island community, when faced with hurricane-force winds would certainly know enough to board up their windows. Yet, we see windows blowing in all over the place. Not to mention people constantly talking outside in the wind. You wouldn't be able to hear yourself think, let alone talk to someone else. People got attacks of the "stupid virus" just so that the special effects crew could show off. The recurring themes were "hell is repetition" and "island people can keep secrets". In other words, this island is dysfunctional as all get-out. If hell is indeed repetition, then the director must be the devil - the major themes are driven into the ground.
Best line - (Mike relates the story of Job from the Bible) And God says, "You know, Job, there's something about you that really pisses me off."
In conclusion, Storm of the Century is a long, predictable tale of good, evil, and situational ethics without much of a resolution. Debrah does well with what role she's given, but the viewer finds themself wishing for a little spark of Devon-like gumption and independence at the end. Not to mention the fact that she must have been the only cast member to not master the "Down East" Maine accent - she has absolutely no trace of it whatsoever. Sounds like she needed some remedial voice-coaching. Like the weather, SotC is often not what it was predicted to be. I give it three wolf-headed canes out of five.
Now, what the heck am I going to do with all of this spirulina, milk and toilet paper??